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December 7, 2006
New stuff: If I were really brave, this would be posted with no set up. What follows is an excerpt from the overview section of a book proposal I have been plugging at off and on for the past week or so. It's rough and I'm still at least a month away from having it in any condition to approach potential agents.
But posting it makes it seem more real and holds me under the gun to at least see the proposal portion of the project through to the end. I may also get some feedback -- it's a complex book with a rather finicky structure, but feedback on the meter and voice of this section would be appreciated. Even simply answering the question "If you read this section, would you want to read more?" with a simple yes or no in the comments would be helpful.
The book is, on the surface, about being a fat guy who decides to run a marathon. But it's broader than that. If you know me you know that 2004 and 2005 were the worst two years of my life, and that 2006 has been one of the best. It's about dating, Pittsburgh, Boston and trying to be happy. I have given it the working title "The Slut," not because it's about sluts (although there are a couple in there), but because it's the book where I whore myself out and try to get on Oprah.
(I'm just kidding about that last part, although it is part of a broader effort to not be typecast as a true crime writer).
It's also supposed to be a funny book, although this excerpt does not convey that. That's part of the problem with excerpts -- it's just a snippet that doesn't have a broader context so it rarely conveys the true nature of the overall work. Think Bill Bryson walking the Appalachian Trail and you'll have a bit of an idea of what I'm shooting for. To prove the funny point, I should note that a more narrative, more detailed and better crafted version of the "Well Done," post-marathon post will probably be the sample chapter I use for the proposal.
I'm also violating a personal rule to never write anything memoir-esque and a general writing rule to never write about your friends (which seems somewhat contradictory to the "write what you know" rule; writing is full of awful, contradictory rules so it's usually best to just obey the ones that work for you).
A couple of other things to keep in mind if you plan to slog through the next 2,471 words: this is the exception to my rule to not write about anything too personal on this blog. It will not become a habit, so most of you can continue stopping by here without fear of seeing the details of your relationship with me laid bare like the details of the relationship detailed in this excerpt.
I also know there are more than a couple of people who stop by here on occasion who will see that I'm doing a book on the past few years and (rightfully) assume they may turn up as a character in the book (which will be nonfiction). This may be unsettling, exciting or a bit of both to you.
None of those people are mentioned in this excerpt, as I still need to figure out who and what is going to be included. But if you are a potential character, you should know I will be talking about what role, if any, you will have in the book once the proposal is done but before I send it out to an agent or a publisher. You may be interviewed extensively once I start working on the book. You will have an opportunity to read the full proposal before I send it out to the world -- the idea is not to give you a heads up of what to expect but to let you help me make it stronger and more accurate.
For most (but not all) people, I can write around you if you are completely uncomfortable with the idea. And if worse comes to worst, I will scrap the project completely if I fear its going to jeopardize a friendship.
Enough set up. Here it goes...
By way of back story On the last Friday in October 2006 an Aer Lingus airplane is sitting on the tarmac at Logan International Airport in Boston. The flight attendants seem somewhat shabby but friendly in their green uniforms as they hand out magazines, pillows and blankets before takeoff. There is a Gaelic football team on board. The players are wearing navy blue, nylon warm up suits with gold trim and are spread throughout the cabin and settling into their seats for the six-hour flight. They have been in Boston for 10 days playing games and drinking, and they look like hell. A guy across the aisle is missing both canine teeth. Another player is seated a few rows back and has his jaw wired shut. He is sipping a beer through a straw. The player-coach of the team is crammed into the seat next to me and is flirting with a flight attendant checking the overhead compartments. All things being relative, he looks okay, even with his bruised face and a nose that looks like it was broken not all that long ago. When I get to Ireland I will watch a Gaelic football game on television in a pub. It’s a brutal and violent game I don’t fully understand. It combines elements of soccer and rugby that is fun to watch but looks like hell to play. Watching the game, coupled with all the physical ailments around me, confirms that these guys are insane. The time to take off draws closer. A flight attendant comes over the P.A. system and announces that there is a group of runners on board who have collectively raised $XXX,XXX for the Leukemia-Lymphoma Society and that they’re flying to Ireland to run in the Dublin Marathon the following Monday. “Twenty-six miles?” the beaten player-coach seated next to me blurts out at the end of the announcement. “Fucking hell. Those people are crazy.” This is how I got crazy enough to be on that plane.
Download the full proposal excerpt (MS Word Document) Labels: writing
Posted at 7:10 AM
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